I am suffering from another of my vacuum pangs........ those pangs of the typical bipolar depressive phases. I am trying to absorb myself in work, even extra work, even that which doesn't bring me any benefits, neither monetary, nor intellectual or educational.
A part of me is cribbing about the extra work, but the fact is that the extra work exists because I agree to its existence. If I deny doing some work, no one can force me to do it, but the fact is that I do not want to deny it either. Why? because I know, if I stay back at Home, I'll have those bouts of a quarrelsome mood, and a very negative attitude. So, its better I work.
This vacuum seems to be more of an emotional and psychological nature rather than being that of a physical or materialistic nature, though the precipitating causes can be something as simple as .............why did a friend not pick my call just when I called, or why did mom not cook a certain vegetable, or why wasn't my printer functioning (though it now is).
Lord,
Help me sustain,
Help me survive.
Amen!
©anu (Exploring Myself)
A good technique to change your state: Breathe fast with empasis on deep/abdominal breathing. In a few minutes you will be out of your depressive mood i.e. if you want to get out of it:)
ReplyDeleteI'll try it ASAP, thanks :)
ReplyDelete