Abrupt Choices and Random Thoughts

I made two abrupt choices today. To finish off Shantaram and to join a Mehandi course. I loved drawing the shapes that have long lured, attracted and enchanted me:) For quite some time now, I have applied henna on palms. But now I'll learn more, better and harder. Those patterns help me fill my gaps, silences. I understand today in reality what did I find intriguing in Athena's wanting to fill the gaps (during her calligraphy classes) when I read 'The witch of Portobello'. I today had a similar urge. I wanted every inch of the paper to be full of those patterns, and not just those columns or organised patterns. I wanted, yearned for it suddenly to completely erratic. And I wished I could be as erratic too.

I suddenly had the need to restart reading Shantaram, I do not know why. I haven't slept for last 38 hours now, and am still not sleepy, and am just fine and OK. I have some 100 pages more to go with Shantaram and then I'll be free to re-read those parts that I want to think over and ponder over. There are quotes I wish to mull over.

I also have to do a lot of vocab from that book, it's good :D The figures he mentions about crime, the facts about the organised crime as in the end of twentieth century, the facts about a man used, manipulated, misguided, cheated and resilient enough to be resurrected, this book has somehow kept me entwined in its intricacies of human life/thought/nature.

I also wish I could write something, something that wouldn't make much sense and yet would be sensible enough. I wish I could do that. Something more than this blog. I miss my singing classes too. I wonder if I'll ever have enough money to be able to pursue reading, writing, singing without working like a yoked ox, or without worrying for basic amnesties. Sometimes I do wish I was Lin minus his criminal instincts. Or may be I'm already that.

But, enough musing for now :)